Raising an Infant

 
If someone asked the mother which stage of child development would mostly likely influence the achievements of her child, she would probably say that every stage, from birth up until adolescence, is equally important. While this is true, the most important stage ranges from birth to one year, when the baby's brain creates his most lasting impressions of his caregivers. The baby's personality and emotional development will be strongly shaped by his first year and the patterns of association he creates. These patterns are created by cue-response incidents in which a baby learns to expect certain responses, such as comfort, after cues such as crying. These patterns predict the course of future relationships and set the crucial precedent for the baby to learn how to trust people.

The baby's first impressions of the world will be life lasting impressions. The early patterns of association that he creates will influence his adult traits of empathy, trust, closeness and self-esteem. As a responsive parent, the mother will teach the baby how to respond to the needs of others, how to comfort others, how to trust those around him as well as trust himself and ultimately, how to find happiness.

The following table highlights various parental activities and the information stored as a result in the baby's brain. The last column examines the future traits that are planted as a result of this parental activity:

The mother's Actions	Message Stored by the baby	Future Trait
Sensitively responds when the baby cries	When I want to say something, someone listens	Trust in one's ability to communicate
Feeds the baby when he's hungry	My parents will fulfill my needs	Believe that people are responsive and caring
Frequently makes eye contact with the baby	I can get lots of information from faces, they are fun too!	Develop a knack for reading people's faces
Holding the baby frequently	I feel unafraid and calm when I'm held	Enjoys and feels comfortable with being intimate with someone
Comforts the baby when he is upset	Other people can understand what I'm feeling and they will help me	Understanding for the situation of others (empathy)
Carries the baby in a baby sling	I think my world is interesting!	Curiosity Openness to new experiences
Sleeps close to the baby	Sleeping is pleasant and I don't have to be afraid to go to sleep	The capability to relax Healthy sleep habits
Reflects her love and happiness to the baby	I make others happy, that makes me happy!	Happiness Contentment

It is very important to remember that as an infant, the baby is a very eager and competent learner. Not only does the baby need stimulation from the mother, he also needs to know that he can manipulate the environment around him. Provide him with toys and other methods of producing his own stimulatory behavior. Also remember that the baby is a sensory-motor being. He will develop his senses and his motor skills long before he acquires other abilities. Provide the baby with toys that have a variety of textures, colors, sounds and uses to ensure that expose the baby to the various sensations and movements crucial to his development.

Even though the baby cannot speak, he is still a communicator. Crying and gurgling may be his initial tools of language but he will develop further skills by hearing individual conversations between adults and having people listen and respond to his communication efforts. The baby's communication skills stem from his social personality which helps him to connect to the world around him. He will do well in individual interactions with adults, however his social skills are not developed enough to enjoy or handle group experiences.

While the baby might not understand the spoken language of his world, he is still very sensitive to the tones and feelings of spoken language and that of body language as well. Even though they cannot say it, babies feel anger, jealousy, humiliation, hurt and rejection. To avoid these feelings, give the baby lots of love, attention, praise and appreciate his presence.

As a parent, the mother will have to adjust her expectations for an infant by expecting the baby to:

· Be different from other babies

· Use crying as a form of communication

· Need his parents urgently

· Explore his world

· Test his limits

· Experiment with his body and his senses

Infants have critical needs that need to be addressed in order for them to grow and reach their fullest potential. The following is a list of needs that the mother should ensure she has met for him:

· Give the baby a basic sense of trust. The mother should be responsive and predictable in her care and help the baby to develop good self-esteem, along with the courage to accept new challenges later in life. Ultimately, the baby will need to feel a sense of familiarity, acceptance and safety.

· Give the baby a chance to interact with the world of people and its objects - create a safe world for the baby to explore where he can move around and manipulate his environment. The baby will learn valuable lessons about the relationship between self, space and other people.

· Give the baby a sense of independence - let him feel like he is a separate person. Teach him he can learn to make decisions and say 'yes' and 'no' freely on his own. He will learn to use this independence to control his feelings and body.

· Let the baby feel powerful and competent - show him that he can make a difference and that he can achieve goals. In a group setting, let the baby move about and try new activities. Let him deal with minor difficulties, such as putting on a coat, to let him learn that he is competent.

What the baby needs the most is responsive and nurturing care. The following tips are actual actions that the mother can carry out to ensure that the baby feels worthy of love:

· Smile and talk with him when he babbles.

· Get his toys for him and play hide and seek, peek-a-boo etc.

· Sing to him when he is sleepy.

· Feed him when he is hungry (of course!).

· Hold him when he is sad or loving or just needs some attention.

· Show pleasure when he acquires new skills such as climbing, holding or learning new sounds and words.

· When the baby is bored, help him discover new ways to entertain himself.

· Watch for things that excite the baby such as playing with toys and exploration and allow him to engage in these activities.

· Make sure you know when the baby needs some quiet time and a place where he can be alone.

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