Parent Child Relationship Tools

 
Being a responsive parent does not always mean saying 'yes'. It means being responsive within boundaries while being caring and supportive if sometimes it is necessary to say no. The following is a list of seven tools that the mother can use to ensure that from the earliest point on, she and the baby will have a strong connection that will last.

Remember though, that these are not strict rules but general guidelines to be used as applicable to the mother's life.

Bonding at Birth

Staying physically close after the baby's birth is one way to ensure the bonding process begins early. In about the first hour after birth, newborns are very alert and gaze intently at human faces. Having the baby close to the mother will help the mother to soothe him whenever he needs it. If for some reason the mother and the baby are separated after birth, do not fret. Birth bonding can take place even after the birth, but staying together from the start can provide a head start on a life-long connected relationship.

Breastfeeding

Not only does breastfeeding help to give the baby a boost to his immune system and an excellent source of nutrition, it also aids the mother in her ability to read the baby's emotions. The mother can sense when the baby is hungry and needs his mother, and the baby can trust that the mother will be there to nurture him whenever he needs it. As well, hormones such as oxytocin and prolactin that are produced during breastfeeding serve to create a calm and relaxed atmosphere for the mother.

Baby Sling

A sling or babywearer will help the mother and the baby to stay close all day as the mother performs chores. If the baby is carried he will fuss less and spend his day alertly observing his environment. This closeness will promote sensitivity and enhance the parent-child connection.

Keep the baby close to the mother's bed

Keeping the baby's crib in the mother's room can allow the baby to feel safe and comfortable in the act of going to sleep. As well, breastfeeding can be carried out more conveniently this way. If work and other chores keep the mother busy for most of the day, co-sleeping can be an ideal way of reconnecting with the baby at night.

Understand the Language of Crying

Crying is a signal used by babies to communicate a need necessary for their survival. If the mother can respond sensitively and quickly to the baby's cries then he will in turn learn to trust her. Ignoring the baby's crying will be like ignoring someone talking to the mother. Not only is it rude, but the person being ignored will not try to communicate again and will often feel neglected and angry. In the same way, as the baby grows he may feel that his needs are not worth addressing.

Don't get on the 'baby training' train

Avoid rigid and extreme parenting styles that aim to control the baby and push him into a schedule convenient for the parents. A baby raising schedule will create distance between the mother and the baby by focusing on controlling, instead of connecting with one another.

Find a balance and make some boundaries

Do not forget though, that there is a spouse and a life of the mother's own that needs to be taken care of. Father's can play a big role in maintaining the balance in a family by taking care of chores, etc. Remember that the mother's well being is also very important and she too must to pampered, along with the baby.

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